it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
We left the knife in your bed.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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