I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
