Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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