I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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