how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
