one two three fourrrrnication!
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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