I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
