She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
She's JV to your varsity
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
