Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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