thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
