508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
In America we eat man semen.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
