Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
