Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Randomize
