Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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