Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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