Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
