Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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