Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
