ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
