Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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