We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
