Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
