Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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