Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize