CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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