I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize