you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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