The maid of honor just puked.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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