I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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