are you so shy because you have an std?
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Drake has all the answers
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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