I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
