your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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