porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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