Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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