pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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