bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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