in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
