at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
