butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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