So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
