I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
