Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
