You work out of a Hotel?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Randomize