do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
