I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
