let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize