We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
