i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize