question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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