she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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