People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
